“walks into a bar” jokes for nerds

in preparation for my soon-to-be short-lived comedy career, I have crafted a handful of esoteric “walks into a bar” jokes:

an anthropomorphism walks into a bar. get it?

a solipsist walks into a bar. or perhaps it was merely an internal mental projection of some sort.

a premonition always had a feeling that it would walk into a bar.

a paraprosdokian walks into a bar and no one gets the joke.

a malapropism walks into a barn.

a simile walks into a bar like a metaphor checks into a hotel.

that’s all I got . . .

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on observational comedy: my personal observations

I know that a lot of people feel that “observational comedy” has become so overdone. But I think I’ve found one facet of the genre that has yet to be fully exploited.

The way I see it, most comedians tend to focus their efforts on making witty observations about the world. But me, I have decided to dedicate myself to making all the observations, not just the witty ones. For instance, in my burgeoning comedy routine, I will say things like “Hey look, a chair.” Or “This thing in my hand appears to be a microphone.” Or “It seems as though nobody is laughing right now.” And so on.

All in a day’s work for this comedic pioneer…